I wish I could remember what that editor said to me about how her boss hated when columnists would write essays about dead dogs. It was “dead dogs and…” something else. I can’t remember.
Live cats? Broken romances? Near-fatal car accidents? Still can’t remember. I only remember the dead dog part.
Which is why I was reluctant at first to put this picture and this quote on my personal Facebook page.
“Once you have had a wonderful dog, a life without one, is a life diminished.” --Dean Koontz
Even though this dead-dog-story-hating boss is a friend of mine on Facebook and may have seen the post, I felt OK about doing it, because I didn’t make any additional remarks. Didn’t have to. Couldn’t. What could I say? RIP Sirius Black Dager, 10-15-02 to 03-02-15? That just sounds so... yucky. I admit something equally yucky--that even though I don't believe in heaven, that's where I told my grandson that Siri went: doggie heaven. Because he's four and I'm either a coward or a wonderful grandma for not wanting to traumatize him. I'll go with wonderful coward.
Anyway, I’ve been moping around for four days, crying occasionally and second-guessing our decision to let Sirius go. Based on his declining health, it was clearly time to do so, and he wasn’t going to get better, nor was he going to leave on his own.
But "helping" him pass doesn’t make this any easier, "right thing to do" be damned.
He really was the best dog I ever had. I’ve loved all my animals, but this guy was special. I know I sound like everyone else with a beloved dead pet, but you can think whatever you want. I don't care. He was a great dog and this one was a lot harder than every other pet's passing I've had to deal with. Harder than some people I know, too.
And while I try to forget his last moment, which was, thankfully, peaceful, he prances and herds in memory, and lives on in cumulative dog hair that the vacuum will never pick up, and is mine forever in the password to my laptop.
And if you don’t like this particular dead dog story, don’t worry because I’m not writing another. I can't vouch for others, however. There will always be some dead dog somewhere to write about.